Sing Me to Sleep | The Two Lives of Lydia Bird by Josie Silver

Have you ever had a dream that felt so real and almost so perfect that you didn't want to wake up back to reality? Following the success of her debut novel, One Day in December (which I highly recommend reading), best-selling author Josie Silver delivers again with a beautiful, poignant story about love, loss, and the journey to finding yourself again after such heartbreak in The Two Lives of Lydia Bird. There are a lot of good things I can say about this book as it is probably one of the few books that I have read where I completely empathized with the character's emotions from beginning to end while it also left me feeling hopeful.

Lydia Bird and Freddie Hunter have always loved each other and been together since they were fourteen years old. They were inseparable and ready to start the next chapter of their lives as husband and wife. Then suddenly everything changed. On the night of Lydia's twenty-eighth birthday, Freddie dies in a car accident with their friend, Jonah Jones, as the only survivor. The death devastates everyone, from Lydia to her mother, her sister, Elle, and her brother-in-law, David. It also strains her friendship with Jonah.

Wanting to get away from her world without Freddie but also struggling to sleep, Lydia's doctor prescribes her a bottle of regular sleeping pills to help. The moment Lydia takes them and goes to sleep, she magically finds herself in an alternate reality where Freddie is still alive. It all seems too good to be true, but it's real. Each night Lydia takes the pills and goes fast asleep, she gets to live a whole other life where Freddie never died and gets to experience what could have been.

Meanwhile back in the real world, Lydia slowly begins to take steps moving forward while still grieving Freddie. With the help of her family and friends, and even reconnecting with Jonah again, Lydia soon starts to find some light from the darkness. At the same time however, she also finds herself conflicted living between the new life she's creating in her world and the other life she has with Freddie when she sleeps. Between two worlds, Lydia goes on a journey of not only accepting loss but also finding her way back.

The Two Lives of Lydia Bird reminded me a bit of Rebecca Serle's The Dinner List, in terms of the magical element, with a touch of Gail Honeyman's Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine and Jojo Moyes's Me Before You. Although, I think Josie Silver's novel stands out as its own and is probably my favorite of all others. I loved reading this book and shed both sad and happy tears as I connected with all the characters, especially Lydia and Jonah.

Initially going into it, I found the premise a little too unbelievable. The idea of going to sleep and living an alternate life with someone you lost seemed like an interesting story, but I could not see how you could make an entire novel about it. Josie Silver proved you can and she did. 

The novel starts off with the aftermath of Freddie's death after the initial prologue and gets you acquainted with Lydia and the characters as they go through the loss. It's a little somber, which is to be expected, and the author does not sugarcoat the grief that Lydia experiences which makes her character's emotions raw and real, while also not making it too jarring on the readers. When Lydia does find herself in another life where Freddie's death never happened, it took me a while to accept, which was probably the same for the character as well. As the story progresses however, the magic element of it coincides so seamlessly with the story as a whole that I hardly noticed it anymore and accepted it. I also liked how the author handled answering some questions that came to mind right away while not pausing to give a whole in-depth explanation, such as does Lydia go into her other life every single time she sleeps (nope, only when she takes the sleeping pills) and if she gains a new set of memories from her alternate life (no, her experience is like hopping into the middle of a movie and trying to figure out what happened while she was away. Think Nicholas Cage's character in The Family Man).

Lydia and Jonah's relationship is the heart of the book, along with both characters' personal growth. As I was reading, I was curious to see where their relationship was going. Lydia starts reconnecting with Jonah despite a few hurdles beginning with a grief workshop they both attend and later when they try to celebrate their first New Year's Eve without Freddie. We learn that they were best friends before Freddie came into their lives, but that things changed between them as they each developed their own relationship with Freddie that overthrew the bond they originally had. Freddie and Jonah were more like brothers than best friends, while Freddie and Lydia were each other's better halves. Freddie added this amazing spark to their lives that made their lives whole, but now that he was gone they both questioned what was left. With time though, Lydia and Jonah become friends again remembering the bond that they had always had since they were children. I liked how the author did not force anything between them too quickly and focused first on how they gradually rebuild their friendship while also dealing with the loss they both share. They understand each other's grief more than anyone who knew Freddie, so they understand the choices they each make in their lives. I won't spoil anything but overall I really loved the journey both characters go on and what they find and learn from each other at the end.

The trips between Lydia's real world and her alternate one is actually an important element to the story that not only works well, but helps her character's development and journey to self-discovery. She starts to see things clearly than I think she would have had she not had this passageway between two lives. 

In her real life, she gets to experience a chance at a new love when she organizes a silent speed-dating event at the community center where she works. If you are wondering what silent speed-dating is, it is basically like regular speed-dating but instead of talking you just communicate by looking at each other or using some non-vulgar hand gestures. If this exists, please sign me up just to fulfill my curiosity. Lydia is actually forced to participate to even out the number of people who signed up for the event, and what transpires is funny but also sweet. I felt this chapter and what follows after was classic Josie Silver returning to her lighthearted romantic comedy roots like she did in One Day in December. It was enjoyable reading the newfound romance between Lydia and Kris, who I am pretty sure was actually Chris Hemsworth or Alexander Skarsgaard based on the description, that it was probably my second favorite part of the book apart from the ending, which I will get to briefly later. 

Apart from meeting a potential new love interest, Lydia also begins to see herself differently than she does in her alternate life. In her alternate life, she feels a little stunted. I don't think it is because Freddie held her back, which he didn't, but I think it is because she chose to hold herself back while with him. Compared to her real life, Lydia starts to build some confidence in herself and play with seeing what she likes and wants on her own. She even decides to adopt a cat, which she never would have done with Freddie. Even her relationship with Freddie in her alternate life feels different. Ever since he died in her real life, she's become sentient about loss and how precious every moment is with someone that when she sees him in her alternate life her emotions and reactions are different than what Freddie is used to and what she may have been used to too. It's moments like these that help Lydia grow and why this magical element works so well. It adds a new layer of figuring out who she is while also understanding the two lives she currently lives in and how they affect her past, present, and future. On a lighter note, I did like how she got to experience all the things she was suppose to experience with Freddie from their holiday together in Paris to even their wedding.

The ending - oh what could I say. It was perfect. I felt everything that lead up to it was earned, from the relationships that developed to Lydia's acceptance on the love she lost but will always treasure and hold onto. I will even say that the ending was quite cinematic, poignant, and even romantic and will leave it at that. The book is not sad as the plot may suggest. It is a reflection on life if anything, filled with humor, romance, loss, and friendship experienced by one character living two lives. Reading Lydia Bird's journey to finding herself again and that part of her that was always there but she never knew existed is what made The Two Lives of Lydia Bird so great. As Freddie always said before ending a call to Lydia: over and out.

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Music Playlist for The Two Lives of Lydia Bird

While reading the book, a couple of songs came to mind that I thought would fit the tone of the story as well as the characters. Below is a list of songs you can listen to while reading or even after, and are great for those that listen to music when they sleep as you keep calm and snooze on.

"Asleep" by The Smiths

If you know this song, then you may have gotten my nod to it in the title of this post. This was immediately the first song that came to mind when I first started reading the book and not because the book and the band are British. I thought it captured Lydia's sadness and longing for Freddie and to be with him when she discovers she can when she sleeps. In the beginning, sleep is better for her than a reality where he is not there.

"Holy Smoke" by Palace

This song by Palace reflects on grief but also letting go and saying goodbye with melancholy and catharsis. I thought this one perfectly goes with Lydia at the end of the book, especially in one particular scene with Freddie in her other life, as she assures with hopefulness that they will be fine.

"Keep On Loving You" by REO Speedwagon

Does anyone remember that scene in the movie Drive Me Crazy starring Melissa Joan Hart and Adrian Grenier when they are singing this song in the car while others look at them? I thought that that scene and this song captured Lydia and Freddie's fun and maybe sometimes corny but loving relationship. They were a couple who enjoyed being together and doing the things they loved to do, like exploring cities without a guidebook. I could totally see them singing this song to each other (Freddie would have definitely been Melissa Joan Hart in the scene) with lyrics that ring true to how they felt about one another, especially for Lydia.

"All Out of Love" by Air Supply

If I could get into spoilers - but I won't - this song reminded me of Lydia and Freddie, but mostly Lydia and another man she falls in love with. Just listening to the lyrics after reading the book has me smiling from ear to ear because it fits them so perfectly, especially at the end after everything they have been through.

"Lover" by Taylor Swift

How could I not add this song on the playlist. Does it even need any explanation? I think if I had to pick one song that would summarize this book, it would definitely be this one. It is so dreamy and romantic that it encapsulates the lighter, wishful feeling of the entire book, its tone, and its characters.

"Perfect Memory" by Remy Zero

I think along with Palace's "Holy Smoke" this song by Remy Zero is what would be played at the end of a movie adaptation of this book, like just before the end credits roll. It puts everything Lydia had with Freddie from her two lives into perspective and how she will always remember him and look back on everything they had with nostalgia than grief. It's symbolic of her moving forward while also forever holding on to him as she goes. I will even add that it reflects Lydia and Jonah as well from where they were in the beginning to where they are at the end. It fits the Alfred Lord Tennyson quote too that Lydia mentions when she thinks of Freddie: 'Tis better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all.